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Uptime & Downtime & Out of Time

11/28/2018

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I'd like to practice mindfulness.  If a moment would just be still long enough, I would happily plop myself into it and be grateful - truly grateful.  How is it already the end of the year?  I'm back in June somewhere.  Furthermore, the flurry of this season simply hastens the race to the New Year and all that entails.  I'm agitating myself more by thinking about it.  And once again, the idea of mindfulness floats in like an overarching angel shining down on a lowly sinner. 

Let's take a look at the tech definitions for uptime and downtime.  As you probably know, I'm fascinated by computer terminology and use it as an overlay for personal exploration.  Skillcrush.com explains: "Uptime and downtime describes how long a website, computer, or other system has been working (uptime) or not working (downtime)."  This is simple enough, however, there is no accounting for the cyber-self, mine especially. See Cyberself - No Syndrome.  As far as time is concerned, my cyber-self has no problems.  It simply thrives on cyber action.  I rarely shut down my computer, but will put it on sleep mode in the evening.  There is no doubt my cyber-self does not sleep.  It roams and romps behind a dark monitor screen.  I know this.  How else would Costco and Sierra Trading Post know I still have items in my shopping cart?  And who found new friends for me on Facebook?  And why does my phone send me useless alerts in the middle of the night?

I need some serious downtime.  With this in mind and moving beyond the idea of mindfulness, I've been exploring what I call Subjective Time.  This works for me.  I merely close my eyes and let my mind wonder.  I don't try to calm it, still it, or control it.  I just let it wonder.  I've named this part of myself, the subjective-self.  Although my cyber-self and subjective-self do have similar traits, my subjective-self is not tied to my pocketbook, people, facts, or physical responsibilities.  During Subjective Time, I find myself refreshed as my subjective-self wonders around ideas, drifts in and out of times, places, beliefs, dreams, and gently pushes past the contours of concepts.  I am in a moment that opens to a time outside of time - another meaning for "out of time."  This one suits me.

Uptime, downtime, in or out of time.  Join me. 
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